This journey was not chosen by me. I was abruptly forced to begin it.
About ten years ago I had gotten fairly sick and went to the doctor. I didn’t know what was wrong with me. I thought that maybe I had a brain tumor or a flu that I couldn’t get rid of. I would go into a store and suddenly start sweating, feeling out of kilter. My heart would start pounding and my vision would go weird. I would also be shaky and I had an intense need to run out of the store which of course I couldn’t resist. Once I left the store the symptoms would ease off. This also happened to me while I was driving. It really freaked me out. The doc did the usual check up, couldn’t find anything wrong. He said that it was just stress and gave me a sample packet of Paxil. The doc told me to come back in three weeks and to tell him I was happy. Well I took the pill a few hours later with all expectations of feeling better. Just over a half hour later I started feeling very ill. I thought that I was getting the flu. I didn’t think that I could feel that nauseated without actually throwing up. I went to the bathroom and looked in the mirror and was quite startled to see my eyes. The pupils were so dilated that I could barely see the iris. It freaked me out and then I knew something else was wrong. I drove myself to a friends place and she took me to the hospital. The same doctor happened to be on call. He couldn’t believe it. I was bouncing off the walls in a cold clammy sweat, extreme nausea and a really dry mouth. The doc gave me something to counteract it. It help a bit but not much. I was sick for about a month after taking the Paxil. I had a hard time eating and lost about twenty pounds. But that experience started me on the journey I am on today.