Writing about myself

I should be doing my therapy homework but instead I am writing about it.  I have put it off for about two weeks now.   I am supposed to write a letter to my therapist about myself.
She wants me to write it as if it might be a friend who is writing about me and who knows me intimately and sympathetically .  She wants me to write of the changes that I have made since I started therapy.  And apparently she will also be writing a letter to me.  That will be interesting as well as nerve-wracking.  I know therapy is supposed to be all about me but I’m not comfortable with the attention towards myself.

So I open my journal to write and all I can do is stare at the paper.  I am at a loss for words.  I can’t think of any good things to say about myself but I could fill pages up with bad things.  Why is that? There must be good things that I have done in therapy, ways in which I have changed for the better.  My brain has been spinning trying to find something to write.

How have I changed since I have started therapy?  Well, one thing I do know is that I have shared some things with my T that I have never shared with another single human being before.

Maybe I can start there as I stare at the blank piece of paper trying to figure out what to write.

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8 Responses to Writing about myself

  1. well, I dont know you, but just from this limited information it would appear to me that you show dedication and respect to your own healing process/needs. That you are patient and take the time and effort necessary. Possibly compassionate with yourself along the way?

    It is also a possibility to give yourself time, and not expect it to be all /done/.

    Showing courage to be vulnerable.

    Trying to undertake endeavors such as writing letters outside your comfort zone – streching limits, developing and growing =) More tolerant of other ppl/their problems?

    Sharing your experience online and helping other ppl.

    What about setting some categories like: you/T relationship and trust how it has changed, you/other ppl, you/yourself. must be various domains it influences.

    I am rambling a lot, just seems unlikely that there are not many nice and good things to say, even though I wouldnt know which ones since I dont know you 🙂

    • lostinamaze says:

      I do want to heal and have stepped way out of my comfort zone in this process. That is a big change with me. These things you have written will help me to remember. Thank you

  2. Harriet says:

    Some things you’ve told me lately are that you have finally, after a year of therapy, started opening up and verbalizing your feelings. You are persevering in your journey to learn how to share your feelings with others. Those are big!

    • lostinamaze says:

      I have always been completely closed to others. You are right, the opening up is huge. I tend to “forget” what I have accomplished when it comes to myself.

  3. Rach says:

    If it were me, I’d use this post as the start of the letter, and let it flow from there…

    I’m not sure what province you’re in, but if you drop me an email, I’ll see what I can do to find info about extraneous billing for you.

    ~R

  4. Marie says:

    Hi, lostinamaze –

    How about that you are committed to looking for answers and for a better way? That is huge . . not many are that brave.

    – Marie (Coming Out of the Trees)

    • lostinamaze says:

      Hi Marie,

      Finding answers and then stepping out of my safe zone with the answers can be very scary. Interesting that when I do something that is scary for me I don’t think of it being brave. I guess I need to give myself more credit.

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