Category Archives: Dissociation

Integration

I haven’t given this word much thought. I’ve read many blog posts on this concept but never related any of it to myself.  That is until a few sessions back. We didn’t talk about this in-depth it just came up … Continue reading

Posted in Abuse, Anxiety, Control, Conversation, Dissociation, Fear, Therapist, Therapy, trauma, Uncategorized | 6 Comments

Around and Around I Go

I walk into her office feeling split.  Two people have walked into the room.  One feeling the all-pervading sadness that hasn’t eased up.  The other part walks in feeling totally dissociated and not feeling a thing.  How that is possible … Continue reading

Posted in Abuse, Conversation, Dissociation, Grief, Therapist, Therapy, trauma | 4 Comments

Words

I live in my head, unconnected to my body.  I am starting to see how true this is.  In last night’s session as well as many sessions before she asks me how I’m feeling.  She asks me what are the … Continue reading

Posted in Abandonment, Abuse, Anxiety, Conversation, Dissociation, Family, Fear, Grief, Relationships, Running, Therapist, Therapy, trauma, Trust, Uncategorized | Tagged , , , | 6 Comments

Why I Need Therapy

Although I was able to work through the issues that I wrote about in the last post through sheer determination there is still so much more.  And the saddest thing is that I never knew where these problems came from.  … Continue reading

Posted in Abandonment, Abuse, Anxiety, Attachment, Change, Control, Conversation, Dissociation, Fear, Hurt, Panic, Panic Disorder, Relationships, Terror, Therapist, Therapy, trauma, Trust, Uncategorized | 6 Comments

Noncommittal

I spent the afternoon trying to remember what I wanted to work on in therapy.  Even trying to remember the reason I do/have done therapy seemed to have vacated my brain.  I think I was well into what I call … Continue reading

Posted in Anxiety, Conversation, Dissociation, Fear, Panic, Therapist, Therapy, trauma, Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , | 11 Comments

Development upon Development

Change.  I really don’t like change.  Fast.  I don’t like when things are moving fast. It makes my head spin.  It makes me dissociative. On Tuesday I went to the doctor to have my wrist x-rayed once again.  It seems … Continue reading

Posted in Anxiety, Change, Control, Dissociation, Panic, Panic Disorder, Therapist, Therapy, Uncategorized | 8 Comments

Sick

I don’t usually don’t do warnings about triggers because I don’t really know what triggers people.  I try not to talk or write  in detail mainly because I don’t like to.  But there might be some stuff in here that … Continue reading

Posted in Abuse, Anxiety, Dissociation, Father, Fear, Hurt, Relationships, Terror, trauma, Uncategorized | 10 Comments

Eighth Session

She said she thought it was the best session so far.  I looked at the group member and thought “interesting, I thought it was the worst one”.  For me anyway. They talked about conflict.  Not a good topic for me.  … Continue reading

Posted in Anxiety, Control, Dissociation, Family, Father, Fear, Mother, Relationships, Terror, Therapy, trauma, Uncategorized | Tagged | 10 Comments

Stranger

“How does it feel to you?” she would ask.  “What do you mean ‘how do I feel’, I feel nothing” I would respond. “What emotion are you feeling?” she would ask.   “ I’m not sure”. “I think I feel something … Continue reading

Posted in Anxiety, Control, Dissociation, Therapist, Therapy, trauma, Uncategorized | 9 Comments

Confused as Ever

I forgot today what my t and I were going to do this session until she mentioned it herself.  It seems all things have gone out of my mind except for confusion.  I’m also struggling with dissociation now.  A little … Continue reading

Posted in Anxiety, Attachment, Dissociation, Therapist, Therapy | 27 Comments